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It was an unexpected hug that gave Nita the strength to fight – once again – for her life.
Nita is a mother, grandmother and great-grandmother and a family-based provider for two adult women with mental retardation, Judy and Connie (names have been changed). For her, having Judy and Connie in her life is “the best of all worlds.” They are part of her family and even her children have accommodated their homes, so Judy and Connie will be comfortable when they visit.
“We’re a normal family,” she says. “We shop together, watch television together” – they’re even losing weight together! They love to travel and have been to Nashville, Memphis and many other places. Everyone treats them as a family: Nita’s children and grandchildren, her siblings, her neighbors, even the restaurants and stores they frequently visit. Also a part of the family – and a very important part, according to Nita – is their dog, who she says helps communicate with Judy and Connie.
Judy is in her mid-30’s and has been with Nita for 17 years. Connie, now in her late 60’s, joined the family a year later. Nita says becoming a family-based provider was a “process.” She first worked with a training center, then with a group home and a residential facility, before a co-worker told her about an advertisement for family-based providers. Judy and Connie “are my full-time job,” she says.
Nita joined Omni Visions about ten years ago, transferring from a direct contract with the state. She cites the staff’s response and ongoing training. They also take care of communicating with the different agencies who respond to Judy’s and Connie’s needs.
Nita says that Judy and Connie have taught her more than she’s ever taught them. “It’s amazing the joy you can get if you don’t expect something big,” she says, sharing the happiness when Judy learned to dress herself or enjoying the wind blowing through her hair. The pleasures we often take for granted and the many things we consider as normal, become sources of joy for her family.
And that hug? Nita has faced cancer twice. During one of her battles against the disease, she came home “ready to give up” and retreated into her bedroom. Judy – who does not like to touch or be touched – waited for her to emerge and, when she did, gave her a hug. With that hug, Nita decided to fight. “I would have given up if not for seeing Judy’s eyes,” she says.
Nita is now facing cancer for a third time. “Between God and Judy,” she says, “I’ll be okay.”
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